Brett Favre Unretires for the 32nd Time
Tuesday August 26th 2040
Legendary NFL quarterback Brett Favre announced today that he will be unretiring for the 32nd time. After playing with every franchise in the league, the 70-year old Favre has signed with the Sea of Tranquility Titans of the new NFL Moon League.
Favre, who announced his retirement on May 13th from the Philadelphia Eagles, expressed excitement about playing on the moon.
“The gravity on the moon is 1/6th of the Earth’s and I know this will help my passing game” he said. Favre told reporters that he expects to break all records this year. “As soon as my prosthetic arm is delivered that is.”
Halfway through the 2039 season Favre’s right arm fell off. Being the trooper that he is he played the rest of the schedule, using his teeth to pass the ball.
This wasn’t the first time Favre has lost a limb. During the 2035 season while playing with the Seattle Seahawks Favre lost both legs when the entire defensive line of the opposing Arizona Cardinals ran over him. Favre blamed the incident on an inexperienced offensive line and the fact that “everyone else on the field was 35 years younger than I was.”
The Philadelphia Eagles wished Favre well and praised his performance the past year.
“It was a gritty performance by one of the NFL’s toughest players” declared the Eagles General Manager. “While we would have preferred that Brett was more successful with us, his veteran leadership was an inspiration to the entire team. We wish Brett well. He has our respect. But this year the Eagles are going in a new direction and instituting a youth program with a younger quarterback, perhaps someone still in his 50s.”
The NFL Moon League released a statement saying that “We are obviously very pleased to have a marquee player like Brett Favre play for us in this our first year of operation. This will help tremendously with ticket sales.”
One potential problem is the stadium that the Sea of Tranquility Titans will play their home games in does not have a dome thereby exposing players to the cold dark soundless vacuum of space.
Favre brushed aside any concerns.
“A cold dark vacuum with no sound? Why it’ll be like playing for the Jets again.”
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